Dating while you are in seminary can be a challenge. It looks different for each couple no doubt, with two people involved there is an endless amount of factors to what your relationship looks like while you are in seminary. Are you both in school? In seminary? Are you both working? How involved are you in church? Are you in a small group? Do you lead one? All of these and much more are huge factors in how you need to approach your schoolwork as well as pursuing your boyfriend or girlfriend.
I have found a few things that have helped me along the way that are pretty universal no matter what those factors are. You will have to figure out how they specifically work out for you but I think you will find them as helpful tips.
Find a Time to Study
For my girlfriend and I this is a bit easier since we are both in school right now. Every Tuesday and Thursday morning we try to get together and study at her school library. This has worked out great for us because being in a public space helps not get distracted by our current Netflix show or having distracting conversation among ourselves. Also, I have found we keep each other accountable in our study time, it is harder to get distracted when both of us are trying to be focused. If your boyfriend or girlfriend isn’t in school I would still encourage you to go the library, it is so much less distracting. If he or she has something they like to do for long periods of time try to designate time to study while they do that. It may not be the quality time we all want, but when it’s finals week and your swamped it’s nice to have at least some interaction.
Feed your Souls
We all know that in seminary you can easily fall to reading your Bible as a textbook and not as a way to re-energize yourself. Having a boyfriend or girlfriend can sometimes make that even harder since you have even less free time. Find some time to read the word together. It doesn’t have to be a whole night of getting into the word, but even just a couple minutes in your date night dedicated to the Word will be super helpful, it will remind you that the word is more than just a textbook, and keep your relationship focused on the Lord.
Teach What You are Learning
You’re in seminary for a reason. After a long day of studying and you’re telling each other about what you did all day it’s easy to simply say ‘I studied’ full stop. Share what you learned. You will get some nice review time in right then and there, and it could start some great conversations between the both of you.
Get Plugged In
Pursuing a relationship and working at seminary takes a lot of time, it is easy to suddenly find yourself bouncing between the world of seminary and your relationship and exclude everything else from your life. Don’t do it. We need relationship. When we let our galaxy be filled with the planets of school and relationship everything is going to get out of orbit. God of course needs to be the center where all the other planets orbit, but without the gravitational pull of the planet of outside relationship you’ll quickly find yourself drifting into space. Whether it is your church, a small group or something else make sure you are getting relationship outside of your relationship.
By Noah Myers