Baucham Giveaway Question #2

This book is not an attempt to absolve young women of their responsibility. Ultimately they are the ones who will walk the aisle and take the vows. First, this book will help young women gain a better understanding of what they should be looking for. Second, this book will help young women see the importance of partnering with their parents in the courtship process. Finally, this book will help young women realize their dependence upon God. Reading the biblical characteristics of a godly man can be a bit intimidating.

From What He Must Be: If He Wants to Marry My Daughter by Voddie Baucham ©2009, 28-29. Used by permission of Crossway Books, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers, Wheaton, Il 60187,

How much responsibility should a young woman (either in the home or not) have in the dating or courtship process?

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Written by
Terry Delaney
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  • It’s not that she bears less responsibility than her father or the person she’s dating. It’s that the responsibility of her father and the person she is dating are placed before hers.

  • I think it depends on the situation of the family. In my situation, my father is not a believer, and although my fiance asked him for permission, he didn’t have a very active role in our relationship before then. I would have loved for him to have taken a more active role, but that wasn’t the case. I think it was important for me as the young woman, to seek out other mentor figures who approved of my fiance [before we were engaged] and of our relationship as it progressed toward marriage.

  • I think that the young woman should be ultimately responsible for the choice of husband she makes. In my current train of thought, my daughter’s wishes for a husband seem to be subordinate to my approval, and in turn my approval is subordinate to the Scriptural requirements of a husband as seen in Ephesians 5.

    IF I’ve done my job faithfully, Grace will see things the way I hope to see things as well – that is, according to Scripture. If so, then she is ultimately responsible for her choice of husband. If I’m being a faithful father to her, then my approval of this choice is also an approval of how she has been raised. Yikes, I’m getting scared now.

Written by Terry Delaney